yep put on 700gms this week. *gulp*
Karen asked me if I was ok about it ... well I'm not ecstatically happy about gaining, but right now I cant be arsed stressing about it either. Whether thats good or not I dont know. I could suggest that TOM is finishing, that my ankles are still huge and I'm retaining water ... but the reality it ... I'm over eating. It's not rocket science and those other things are just excuses and self justification for ... yep ... OVER EATING.
Talks with self are falling on deaf ears, self is tired of listening obviously to itself. I've spent the last 3 months basking in my glory of success so I really just need to pull finger out and quite franky - fucking get on with it - but ya know what ... right now I cant be arsed.
My body and brain are just saying ... we've had enough of your pressure for two years, TWO FRICKEN YEARS! so in 12 sleeps I have a triathlon, in about 24 sleeps I'm going on holiday and I am not going to stress myself about this right now. I'm not going to go out and binge eating until the cows come home because I understand the value of food - but right now I'm going to keep on keeping on, making my body fitter and healthier, live life and through all this I'm confident I can make those scales maintain for the next month.
So this morning I was up early and out walking my usual circuit - its so refreshing walking at that time of day. It's warm but there is a cool breeze which makes me feel so alive and tingly by the time I get home. Caught a ride in with Craig today - traffic was horrendous, obviously most of the holiday traffic is back, it can only get worse from next week once schools go back!
Today was full on and I managed to get lots done. I shot off to weigh in at midday and enjoyed catching up with some "old WW buddies" that used to weigh on a Thursday when I weighed ... seems like years ago now! LOL It's great going to those meetings and seeing those smiley familiar faces - man everyone seems so pumped right now!
I left work at 4 today and went down the pool. I swam for 30 minutes straight. I didnt count my lengths, I just swam and swam and swam. All freestyle. I felt great. I made every stroke count, as I raised my arms up and became aware of every muscle moving - through my arms, across my back and shoulders, I could hear my breathing and I felt strong. I also mentally pictured myself swimming in the sea during my swim leg in two weeks. I could visualise the waves hitting against me, I could feel the freezing cold of the water, I could also hear the crowds yelling and cheering on their loved ones and I felt the adrenalin starting to kick in ... it was so cool. I have a feeling that when I get over that finish line I'm either going to scream and shout my joy or I'm going to break down into an emotional wreck. Cant wait its so damn exciting now! 12 sleeps!
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Chunky Chick Strikes Again
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5 comments:
Glad to see you're not stressing about it chickee! No point in doing that - like you said your body has had two whole years of pressure so to speak... prehaps it is your bodies way of saying "hey I need a break"... and like you say you know and understand the value of food and exercise so just keep on doing what you are doing and you will be right. And you will be zooming down the scales real soon.
Wow sounds like you had a great time at the pool and all those mental pictures of doing the swim at the triathlon!
YOU ROCK!!!!!!
I could visually see myself swimming with you hun!! How fantastic would that feel. I used to love swimming but getting into togs is such a hard thing.
You will get back into the groove hun I know you will. You have been doing this for 2 years hun it must be hard to keep it going for that long and doing as well as you have been doing. I applaud you hun... just keep going you will get there.
Love CM
Hi Helena - I know just where you are coming from - I really know how hard it all is to keep being motivated -although reading your journal tonight you really have made HUGE changes to your life and health - I bet you never imagined doing a triathlon!! Big pat on the back for that - OMG I wish I had the guts (and mainly the youth!!!) I think that I would be the emotional wreck myself!! It is exciting!
I really understand that we can get a bit fed up with the changes we've made and I know I sort of want to throw it all to the wind at times - but along with you and many others we've come too far to go back.
Just reading what you have written tonight - if I were you I would be over the moon with the new person you've become - keep it up and I'm sure you will turn the weight gain around. Also make sure you enjoy that holiday!!!
A bit long winded here - but keep up the great work!!
You will get back on track Helena..... We all know you won't let it beat you!. Wow 1st Feb. time is going so fast what the hell happened to Jan.
Cheers Jaxx
Great attitude!! Keep on maintaining for this month while you get through all this stuff and you'll be sweet as. Great work :-) And by the way I thought you looked great in the photo on Jo's website from your brunch on Sunday!
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